The Pros of Good PR

Ah, the end of the quarter. The birds are singing, the bunnies are frolicking, and grades/attendance reports are coming out. This can only mean one thing:

Grading time is always a tense time for teacher-student and teacher-parent relationships. Teachers feel stressed and overwhelmed; many of them feel that students want grades they haven't earned. Parents are also feeling stressed; many of them feel left out of the information loop or are hearing alarming things from their students. When these tensions collide, angry emails or phone calls are exchanged and administration usually gets involved. These issues CAN be resolved, but you have to remember:

 When a school does not have good PR when working with parents and students, relationships sour quickly. Resentment builds between school employees and parents, when both sides tend to have the best of intentions. When an issue comes to me, it's usually because either the parent or the teacher has escalated the disagreement beyond the scope of the initial issue. Here are the top five things I've learned about cleaning up after PR disasters:

1. Give people the benefit of the doubt. It's always possible that someone is lying or twisting the truth, but you can't ever start from a position of disbelief. Listen to all sides of the story with an intention to understand.

2. Understand that a person's perception is their reality. If you feel that someone is twisting the story, this becomes especially important. People, whether they be teachers or parents, don't care about intention if it feels harmful to them personally. Don't address intention; focus on addressing the situation as the complainant perceives it.

3. Remember there is a thinking, feeling human being on the other end of the phone or email. When you're feeling attacked, it is easy to see the attacker as an aggressive, cold-hearted person who cares nothing for anything but their own selfish desires. It takes a serious mental shift to realize that the person on the other side is feeling the same way about you and your reaction can either confirm or refute that assumption. Treat the other person as a thinking, feeling human being - even if they aren't doing the same for you.

4. Remember that most strong emotions stem from fear. Keeping this in mind can help with #4. Why is a parent angry? It's probably because they're afraid. Afraid their student is being targeted. Afraid their parenting is being called into question. Afraid their student won't graduate or won't get into college or won't get a scholarship. The list goes on and on. Identify the fear and then attempt to address it.

5. Apologize and seek a solution. With #1-4 in mind, move forward. It costs nothing to apologize and it goes a long way towards showing you're willing to listen. Then seek a solution. Calmly, honestly, and promptly. It might not be the solution the parent is demanding but with the right PR and a good attitude, you'll solve a lot more than just the initial issue.

 There will always be crazy people and situations you can't believe are happening. But in everyday interactions? Develop good public relations strategies and your job will be a lot easier.

- Sara

Rejection

It's finally spring!  Since the fall we have applied and have interviewed multiple times for many administrative and educational leadership positions and many of us are beginning to think:

However, some of us in the cohort have landed amazing administrative and instructional coaching positions (YAY!) and others, like me, are:

It is not fun to be rejected for positions that you really want and are qualified for.  We are trying to enter into a field that is highly sought after and there is:

So as you ponder joining the field of many people who are trying to become administrators:

 

And it feels awful, you get depressed, but try to stay positive

and think to yourself:

Congratulations to those who have nailed down positions, I am truly happy for you! And to those who are in the same boat as me, think of this quote, because it has rung true to me many times.

Handling Difficult Parents

As a school leader you will be faced with dealing with difficult students as well as difficult parents. Having a teaching background makes handling difficult students easier. However, difficult parents are a whole different ballgame.

So what do you do? How do you handle a parent who is constantly trying to take your authority away?

I have had the opportunity to watch a principal do this respectfully, effortlessly and using authority.

The first thing she does is explain the situation. She is explicit with what she finds and the consequences given. After, she listens to the parents concerns or complaints. This is where parents tend to try to take her authority away. They start blaming the other student. What she does that is great is she explains HOW THEIR CHILD is responsible. At times she might agree that the other student is antagonizing. However she always goes back to, YOUR child did x,y,z. This tends to stop parents in their path. It is difficult arguing with what your child actually did.

As a school leader you need you lead with an example. It will be difficult not to lose your cool when a parent is verbally attacking you. The best advice I have is breathe! If you feel the conversation is not going anywhere, you need to stop it. The principal I’ve worked with has had to respectfully say, “This conversation is no longer being productive. We can pick back up at a different time. Thank you for coming in.” The principal has also had to record conversations with specific parents to be able to show her administrator of schools what is actually happening during the conversation.

The last key piece that the principal does is document EVERY conversation. This is important to be able to be prepared for upcoming conversations.

Being a leader is hard, but YOU CAN DO IT! It will be hard but well worth it. There will be times that you can create good, lasting relationships with parents. However, there will be times that the positive relationship will just not happen and that is okay too. Best of luck staying strong, respectful, and calm.

May the odds be ever in your favor!

-Megan

As we near the end of our class-taking, Praxis-preparing, interviewing year, I sometimes feel that I’m losing my grip on reality. There are days when I’m sorely tempted to pull the covers up over my head and say “leave me be, I changed my mind, I just want stay under here in my safe place”. I wonder what I was thinking, and think about all the money I’ve spent when I’m sure I’ll never find a job in this field. As someone who has habitually strayed out of her comfort zone only as far as it felt warm to the touch, this bold move of jumping into the fire of change has been, to say the least, quite daunting.

Other days I wake up and think “Man, I have got this handled!” A well-spoken interview answer, or a teacher coming to me for approval for something, or being left in charge. Of course I can do this, if only someone will give me the chance. Will they or won’t they? That is the question. What if they don’t hire me anywhere? Does that mean that I failed? I tend to be a person who relates to quotes, and some that spring to mind are:

You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. –Wayne Gretzky

Do or do not. There is no try. -Yoda

I've been thinking a lot lately about taking chances and how it's really just about overcoming your fears, because the truth is, every time you take a big risk in your life, no matter how it ends up, you're always glad you took it. -livelove-quotes

My original plan was to apply to my district, and if I didn’t get anything, then I would stay where I am for a few more years and then retire; better educated, but still in the same stagnant place. As this year began, I changed mind and applied to several districts. So far I have come up dry, but if it doesn’t happen this year, I’m sure I will have the drive to continue trying until something works out. If I tell my students and coworkers that I admire persistence and risk-taking, but am not willing to apply those characteristics to myself, then I probably don’t deserve a position anyway. 

Relationships

Entering into education administration I knew that relationships would be important; relationships with faculty, staff, the community, and most importantly the students.  However, I didn’t realize the severity surrounding the topic.  Over the course of my internship I have learned just how important relationships with various stakeholders can be.  Particularly when working with students.  During my internship I have been in both a primary and secondary setting, both of which I have found relationship building to be important. 

The past four weeks I have been in a secondary setting, and have found out just how essential relationship building among students is.  As a new face on campus many of the students automatically distrusted me.  Some of the students would ask who I was, while others didn’t care.  I found it difficult, never being in a secondary setting, to find ways to build relationships with students.  I would sit down and talk to them at lunch or try to talk to them in the hallways, but these strategies didn’t seem to help.  I began to question how I could form relationships with the various stakeholders, particularly students, when I was only there two days a week.  Additionally, how I, as a future principal, could do this immediately?

As I questioned how to build relationships quickly and ways to go about doing it the importance surrounding this topic was demonstrated.  One particular instance occurred while monitoring the hallways.  During this time it is typical to see students goofing off, or running late to class.  As an administrator you inform students of the correct behavior and recommend that they not be late to class.  While monitoring the hallways last week a group of boys were running through the hallways.  When asked to stop they looked at me and continued their behavior.  After I caught up to them, I introduced myself, and tried to discuss correct behavior in the hallways.  During this time not one of the students would talk or look at me.  They were silent.  As I introduced myself and put out my hand they did not offer theirs back.  At this point I could tell the discussion was going nowhere and they were going to be late for class.  I had them demonstrate the correct behavior and then ushered them off to class. 

During this situation I realized the answers to my questions; caring about students was essential in the relationship building process.  Students need to know and understand that you care about them, resulting in trust.  This takes time.  It is not something that can be rushed and some students feel it quicker than others, while some never feel it at all.  As a future administrator I realize that it is crucial that I build and foster relationships and trust with students.  Relationship building is something that I have always felt was one of my strong points.  I have always been able to build relationships with students and families very quickly.  The past four weeks have helped me to realize that, although this is one of my strong points, there are additional tools that I need in my tool belt.

Angela 

Reacting to Feedback

Being an administrator is a hard job but it is one of the greatest adventures that you could ever have. Each and every day we are blessed to show up at work not knowing what will happen. Between unscheduled meetings with parents, dealing with the insanity of fourteen year olds, and trying to be a good leader, each day has something new to offer, something to teach us. If we can take learn from every day we can always be improving in our roles as educational leaders and be better able to help our students.

 Each interaction can be a positive or a negative learning experience and it all depends on how we react to the situation. I have found that all feedback is good feedback, even when it is hard to hear. A good administrator will be able to handle positive feedback in the same way as negative feedback. Every day as a new principal you are working with adults (Teachers, parapros, other administrators, custodians, community members, parents, etc…) who will tell you how you are performing in your job. It is our job to recognize when and why this is happening and try to use that feedback to change our own practice. If we can continue to learn from each interaction we can continue to grow as educators and leaders.

One of the most important skills to learn is how to interact with parents. Upset parents can give you a huge amount of feedback extremely quickly and you must respond professionally to it at all times. Early this year my mentor administrator said to me that each parent only has the best interest of their child at heart. This statement was extremely eye opening. The advice was a piece of feedback that I needed but in the moment did not want to hear. I always had assumed that parents had the best interest of their child at heart and so I hated being reminded of it. Remembering this ended up being what I needed to improve how I dealt with “tough families.” I have never been a parent and so I don’t know what it is like sitting on the other side of the table, but once I started remembering this while conversing with the family it helped me to understand their point of view. I have now found that when I become frustrated in a situation if I remind myself that the parent loves their child and is trying to help I can find a connection. This connection will allow me work with a parent who I had previously thought was unreasonable. This skill is one that I have been able to take away from feedback which at the time was not pleasant but utterly necessary. It all just depends on how I react to the feedback when it is given. I do not believe any administrator who does not grow from feedback will be successful for a long period of time.

-Erik

Timing and change…

 In a few short months I will graduate with my Master’s degree in an area that I am so passionate about. This has been a goal of mine for so long. It is an exciting personal achievement of mine! Working in education I focused on encouraging my students to set academic goals and develop action plans. I am reminded that “modeling” is one of the great ways in which we teach. During my first year in the program my students loved hearing about my classes and enjoyed laughing that I had homework and tests too! My students knew that I loved education and was a lifetime learner!

My internship experience has given me the fuel to my fire to want to be a principal. I have experienced the overwhelming joy of helping students, families, and teachers in their educational journey. I like to problem solve and evaluate the different opinions presented and make decisions that I feel are in the best interest of those involved.  

This past year I made a very difficult decision. I decided to take some time off from my internship and stay home to be the primary caregiver to my new baby. I had many feelings of guilt…  I worried that I was staying home to help one child, while I could be at work helping 500! Timing and change is hard for me. I feel that being a principal is a lifelong career and right now my excitement, time, and energy is at home with my daughter. I honestly evaluated myself and know that if I was to jump into full time administration I would be concerned of where my time, energy and concerns would be. Would I honestly be there for the students, parents and faculty in my school? Could I give the job the professional attention I feel it needs? I would hate to start into the positon to have faculty, students, and parents feel that I am not ready due to where I know my heart and attention is.

Timing. I love the quote I included in this post. It sums up my feelings perfectly. I know that jobs will always be positing for positions, and when I am ready to step back into the position I will be ready with the time, energy, and dedication the position needs! My internship experience really has shown me the desire I have to become a full time administrator and because of that the timing in which I take on that role needs to be such that I can take it and run with it!

Even though I am wrapping up with my education in our program. I will need to work on staying current and in the loop of education so that I can make the transition back into the field. So even though we are wrapping up with our program we are really never finished... I am a "Lifelong Learner!"
-Alisha